


In My Thoughts

by BreeTaylor



Series: Soulmate AUs [4]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff, M/M, Soulmates, connected by thought, dat age difference tho, literally just fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-29
Updated: 2016-04-29
Packaged: 2018-06-05 04:01:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6688354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BreeTaylor/pseuds/BreeTaylor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Soulmate AU. You can hear the thoughts of your soulmate. It happens at different times for everyone. Some say they can't remember a time not hearing their soulmates, others never do. Ray happened to hear his when his head was slammed into a locker by the resident bully.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In My Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a major sucker for soulmate AUs, so expect to see more. Also, if you've got any ideas for a soulmate AU let me know because, seriously, they're my fav. Enjoy!

It starts differently for everyone. Some claim that they’ve been able to hear the thoughts of their soulmate forever, but for others it doesn’t come until much later—for an unfortunate few, it doesn’t come at all. In Ray’s case, it happened on a particularly rough day in high school. He was sixteen, and one of the class bullies decided that Ray was the one he needed to pick on that day. Ray made the mistake of throwing a sarcastic comment back, and found himself going head first into a locker.

The explosion of pain was quickly overpowered by a voice shouting in his head. Really, it just made everything worse. Because now Ray had a massive fucking headache on top of everything. Dude needed to learn to keep his voice down. Which, also, _dude_. That had been a bit of a shock. It was a nice distraction from the asshole currently making it his mission to leave Ray covered in bruises, though.

_Are you okay?_ His soulmate— _soulmate!_ —thought, _What’s going on right now?_

_Oh, y’know. Just getting pummeled by a jackass,_ Ray quipped back.

_Can I suggest maybe fighting back?_

Ray chuckled, which made the bully angrier. A kick landed right on his ribs, _If I could do that, I wouldn’t really be in this position, would I?_

The assault stopped abruptly, and Ray blinked one eye open. Mr. Judd was standing over him with a pitying look. “C’mon, Ray. Let’s get you to the nurse.”

“I just met my soulmate,” Ray said as they walked. He didn’t know _why_ he was telling his English teacher this. He just knew he wanted to tell someone.

“Did you?”

“Yeah, I guess when Anderson threw me against the locker it opened the connection.”

“Well, at least something good came out of that,” Judd said, “But you really should stop letting those assholes beat on you.”

Ray nodded, but he was already retreating back into his mind, _What’s your name?_

_Ryan, yours?_

Ray smiled. Ryan, he liked that, _I’m Ray._

_Nice to meet you, Ray._

_What’re you doing right now?_

_I’m in class,_ He paused, _How old are you?_

_16._

_Jesus_ , Ryan breathed, _Seriously?_

_Yeah, why?_

_There’s nine years between us._

Ray frowned, _Oh. So you’re in college, then?_

_Yeah…_

He sat down on one of the beds in the nurse’s office, muttering a quiet thank-you to Mr. Judd and assuring him he would be fine. It wasn’t completely unheard of for the gap between soulmates to be large, but Ray had always assumed his would be a pretty girl around his age he could take to prom. Which is weird, because he had no plans to go to prom. He tried to push the disappointment out of his mind. _What’s your major?_

_Math._

Ray crumpled his nose, _Ew, why?_

_I happen to like math,_ Ryan chuckled. _What’s your plan after graduating?_

_I, uh, don’t have one yet,_ Ray responded sheepishly. By some miracle the nurse chose that moment to come in, and Ray quickly excused himself from the conversation with Ryan. So far they didn’t seem very compatible.

* * *

_Is it weird that we haven’t met yet?_ Ray asked a couple months after their connection had been formed. It was almost 2 am, so he wasn’t really expecting an answer. But Ryan’s came almost instantly.

_I don’t think so. I mean, it’s the middle of a semester, it’s kind of hard to leave_.

_Right._

_Do you… want to meet?_ Ryan asked, more cautious than usual.

_Yeah! I mean… you’re my soulmate, right?_ It was the first time the word was said aloud, and it made his heart flutter.

_I guess I am, yeah,_ Ryan chuckled. _Where do you live, anyway?_

_New York City, you?_

_Austin, Texas,_ Ryan said sadly. _That… creates some complications._

_Yeah…_ Ray sighed, staring blankly up at his ceiling. _Have you told anyone yet?_

_A few friends, yeah. Have you?_

Ray couldn’t swallow past the guilt in his gut. He hadn’t really told anyone, aside from Mr. Judd in his spur-of-the-moment declaration. He was scared to know what his parents would think of his soulmate being… well, a guy. _Not really. I, uh… I didn’t know I was into guys._

_Me, either._

_I’m sorry._ Ray thought quietly.

_For what?_

_I don’t want you to think I’m, like, embarrassed or anything. I’m not. You seem really cool, actually. I just. What if my parents aren’t so accepting of your… male-ness? What if they kick me out? What if they disown me—_

_Ray,_ Ryan interrupted. _Take a breath. You don’t have to apologize to me, and you don’t have to tell your parents if you’re not ready to. I’m in the same boat with mine, but they’re all the way in Georgia so I don’t really have to deal with it right now._

_Oh, okay._

_And Ray?_ Ryan said. _If you got kicked out, we would figure something out. I know we don’t really know each other yet, but I’ll be there for you. Always._

_Thanks, Rye._

_Of course. Now get some sleep; you’ve got class tomorrow._ Ray fell asleep with a smile on his lips and a heavy weight lifted from his chest.

* * *

_Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop, make it stop…_ Ray shut his eyes tightly, trying to drown out the noises of his fighting parents, trying to ignore that **he** was the cause of it all. _Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop…_

_Ray?_ Ryan’s voice was there suddenly. Worried, and calming, and just… **there**. Ray let out a sob. _Ray, what’s going on? Are you okay?_

_I’m sorry._

_Don’t apologize. Don’t you apologize to me, you know that. Tell me what’s going on._

Ray tried to keep his sobs quiet, pulling his blankets tightly around him, _They’re fighting again._

_I’m sorry,_ Ryan’s voice—thoughts. His thoughts were quiet. Ray had to remind himself that Ryan wasn’t here, he wasn’t next to him.

_It’s because of me._

_It’s not, Ray. Don’t blame yourself._

Ray shook his head, even though he knew Ryan couldn’t see it. _It is. They’re arguing about graduation next month. Mama wants me to go to college, Dad says we can’t afford it, and that I wouldn’t get in._

_Have they asked you want you want to do?_

_No. I don’t… I don’t know what I want to do._ He took another deep breath. _I’m not like you Ryan; I’m not that smart. I don’t have any special talents._

_Don’t do that. You know that’s not true._

_It is, though._ He flinched as his Dad’s voice got louder, squeezing his eyes shut. _I don’t think I’d get into college._

_I think you can do anything you put your mind to._

_I wish you were here,_ Ray hugged himself tighter. Trying to ignore the shouting.

_Me, too._

* * *

Math wasn’t Ray’s strongest subject. He needed to do well on this test to keep his C+ in the subject. If he failed, his grade would drop to at least a C-. He glanced at the clock, then at his page. One hour left, only two questions done. He kind of felt like he was going to puke.

_Ryan?_

_Aren’t you in a test right now?_

_I’m going to fail this test,_ Ray groaned. _My GPA can’t take this._

_You can do it._

_I really can’t._

_Ray._

_Ryan._ He took a deep breath. _How much do you care about me?_

_What?_

_How much do you care about me, and my future?_

_A lot._

_I’m going to ask you a favor, and you need to promise not to judge me too harshly._

_… Okay._

_Can you please help me get through this test so I can go to college?_ He thought in one, rushed, sentence.

_That would be cheating_.

_I know._

_What’s the first question?_

* * *

Ryan wanted to come to his graduation. He was going to spend his paycheck on a flight to New York. He said he wanted to be there for Ray, to watch him walk the stage. He wanted to actually meet in person for the first time. Ray wanted him to come, too, but he couldn’t… he couldn’t let himself want it. What if Ryan got there and Ray wasn’t what he wanted? He wasn’t exactly the most attractive guy, and Ryan was just… he was Ryan.

_My parents still don’t know,_ Ray lied. Well, sort of lied. His parents **didn’t** know, but that wasn’t really why he didn’t want Ryan there.

_We’ll make it work, Ray. I can get a hotel, play myself off as a friend from somewhere._

_I… I don’t know._

_I want to see you walk, Ray._

_Why?_

_Because I’m proud of you._ He could almost hear the smile in Ryan’s voice. _You’re graduating high school; you’re going to college in the fall. I’m so proud of you._

_You’re making me feel like I’m a child._

_You’re not,_ Ryan insisted.

_I still don’t think it’s a good idea…_

_Why? What’s really going on, Ray?_

_What if…_ He sighed. _What if I’m not what you’re expecting? What if you don’t like what you see?_

_I already know I will._

_How?_

_You’re my soulmate, Ray. Do you not…_ He paused. _I have this ache in my chest, like all of the time. I want to see you, I want to hold you, I want to be next to you. Do you not have that?_

_I do._

_Good, then it’s decided. I’m coming._

* * *

Ray sat his parents down at the kitchen table two weeks before he was due to walk the stage. Three weeks after Ryan had booked his flights. He said that Ray didn’t have to tell them, but he wanted to. He wanted them to know what was going on, and he didn’t want to lose a single second of time with Ryan, so he wanted him to stay at their apartment.

They still fought a lot. It wasn’t just about Ray, but about everything. He could feel the tension in the room and just hoped that this would go well. He needed them on his side.

_Good luck,_ Ryan thought quietly. He promised he’d be there, but insisted he’d stay quiet. It still felt like he was there, a comforting hand on Ray’s shoulder. Soon.

“What’s this about, honey?” His mom asked. She looked concerned, and to be fair Ray probably looked like a wreck.

“Mama, I have something I need to tell you, and I need you to not freak out.”

“What did you do?” His dad asked.

“Nothing!” Ray said quickly, “I didn’t **do** anything. Everything is fine.”

“Okay, well, what is it?”

Ray took a deep breath, “I know who my soulmate is.”

His mother’s eyes lit up almost immediately. A huge smile broke out on her face, and she quickly made her way around the table to pull him into a tight hug, “Oh, baby. You don’t have to be scared to tell us that!”

“Mama, I’m not done,” He said quietly, motioning for her to sit down again. She did, and Ray began to pace slowly in front of them. “I heard him for the first time when I was sixteen.”

“Sixteen?” His mom gasped, “You waited almost **two years** to tell us?”

Ray nodded slowly, “I heard **him** for the first time when Anderson pushed me into a locker. His name is Ryan, and he’s a math major at the University of Austin.”

“He?” His dad asked, “Your soulmate is a man?”

Ray nodded.

“Are you sure?”

“Pretty sure,” He said quietly. “That’s why I waited so long to tell you. I was… worried that you wouldn’t be so okay with the fact he’s a guy.”

“Honey,” His mom moved closer again, cupping his face gently between her hands. “We love you no matter what. You don’t choose your soulmate, after all.”

“Good, well… Well he’s going to be at graduation.”

“What?”

“He booked his flights three weeks ago, and I would very much appreciate it if he could stay with us because he’s kind of a broke college student and I already feel sort of bad that he had to drop a full paycheck on a flight here.”

“I, uh… I don’t see why that would be a problem,” His mom responded, still obviously working through the shock. Ray would take it.

“Why is he coming all the way out here if he’s so broke?” His dad asked.

“Because he’s proud of what I’ve done and wants to watch me walk across the stage.”

* * *

The night before graduation was one of the longest of his life. Thankfully Ryan also couldn’t sleep, and they talked well into the night, until one of them fell asleep. Ray wasn’t sure who went first. In less than a day, he would be seeing Ryan. His flight left at 8am, and Ray gave him strict instructions to come directly to his High School when his flight got in around noon.

Ryan tried to talk his way out of it, saying it was Ray’s last day of classes and he really should focus, but they both knew his arguments were bullshit. Ryan would be there. They’d waited too long for this moment to push it off for something as simple as class.

The morning classes went by at a snail’s pace. He alternated between watching the clock and pestering Ryan. Michael kept looking at him like he was crazy, but he knew how excited Ray was to meet Ryan so he didn’t push it too much.

He was just starting Biology when Ryan’s voice floated into his mind. _I’m here_.

Ray’s heart jumped, and he couldn’t hide the smile on his face. _You’re in New York. You’re in my city. I get to see you today._

_I just have to get out of this damn airport. I’ll be there soon._

_I…_ Ray froze. He loved him. He knew the words were true, but he couldn’t think them. He needed to say them to Ryan. He needed to look him in the eyes and say the words. _I can’t wait to see you._

_Me, too. I’ll be there soon._

“You look like you just won the lottery,” Michael said, “What’s with your face?”

“He’s almost here.”

“Ah.”

“He’s in the city,” Ray reiterated. “I get to see him soon.”

“I know.”

“I’m so excited.”

“I can tell.”

Fifteen more minutes ticked by. _I’m on the subway. I’ll be there soon._

Ray started tapping idly on his desk. He couldn’t focus on anything the teacher was saying, and he didn’t particularly care. Ryan would be here soon. _Two stops._ His heart was beating so quickly in his chest Ray was worried it was going to break free. _I just have to walk from the station. I’ll be there soon._

_I’ll meet you outside,_ Ray answered. He stood up, his chair screeching on the floor as he did so.

“Mr. Narvaez, is there a problem?” Mrs. Gertrude asked.

“Nope, everything is great. I have to leave, though.”

“Uh, we have fifteen more minutes, you can stay for that long.”

Ray shook his head, and continued to walk towards the door. “Mrs. Gertrude, as that would normally be true I will have to disagree with you today. I will gladly take a detention or whatever else, but my soulmate is going to be here any minute now, and I need to go retrieve him. I’ll be back.”

By whatever miracle, she didn’t respond. Ray practically skipped out of the school. He stood on the steps, his heart pounding with nervousness and excitement. _I’m outside._

_I see you._ Ray looked around, but there were **so many** people. One broke into a run, and Ray locked eyes with him. With Ryan. His breath caught in his throat. He was… he was gorgeous. Sandy blonde hair, striking blue eyes, wide shoulders. Ray was moving forward, running towards him as well. Ryan reached the bottom of the steps before Ray, and held his arms wide. Ray allowed himself to fall into them. Ryan’s arms tightened immediately around his waist, and Ray pressed his face into Ryan’s neck, breathing him in. _You’re here,_ He thought out of habit.

“I’m here,” Ryan said aloud. “I’m here.”

Ray pulled back enough to look into Ryan’s eyes. They were **so blue**. “I love you,” He said, and instantly he wanted to say it again, and again, and again. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Ryan said, pressing a kiss to his cheek, “I’m so glad I came.”

“Me too.”

“I never want to let you go.”

“Me neither.”

“But you do have to go back to class,” Ryan breathed into his ear.

“Rye. Rye, let me have this moment please.”

Ryan pulled away, kissing his nose and grabbing his hand. “C’mon, it’s the last day.”

“Only if you promise not to let go.”

“I promise.”

His hand felt so nice in Ray’s as they walked back towards Biology. It was warm, and soft, and strong. Ryan rubbed soothing circles on his palm with his thumb, and their hands swung gently between them. It was beyond perfect.

When they reached the classroom, everyone stopped talking and stared. Mrs. Gertrude raised an eyebrow. “Care to introduce us, or do you plan to disrupt my class in a different way?”

Ray blushed. “This is Ryan. He’s some sort of math major at the University of Austin. We’re soulmates, so yup.”

Michael was staring at him like he’d grown another leg. Ray tugged Ryan gently back towards his seat, pulling an empty chair forward and trying to ignore everyone’s staring. _This is kind of weird,_ He thought.

_Agreed. I feel like we’re on display._

_We kind of are. I mean… you’re hot. I don’t think they expected me to get that lucky._

Ryan chuckled, and Ray heard it aloud. He **felt** it. It was amazing. _Ray, trust me. You’re plenty attractive._

_I am not._

_If I could, I would be doing unthinkable things to you right now._

Ray blushed, ducking his head down to try and hide from Michael’s questioning gaze. _You can’t say things like that, man. I am so close to graduating, I_ cannot _get expelled for fucking someone in the janitor’s closet._

_Ah, as tempting as that is I would really rather have you in a bed for the first time._

Ray wasn’t so sure he was going to make it through the rest of the day.

* * *

He was beyond nervous. The principal had been talking for what felt like forever, but now they were getting close to when they were supposed to walk. He had nothing to be nervous about really, it wasn’t like he had any doubts that he was graduating, but still his stomach was doing flips. He wished Michael’s last name was closer to his own.

_You look like you’re going to puke,_ Ryan’s voice did wonders to relax him almost instantly. It was like a wave of calm washed over him.

_I don’t know why I’m so nervous._

_It’s the end of a chapter of your life. You’re allowed to be nervous._

_I’m so glad that you’re here with me._ Ray said. _Like, physically and mentally. I’m just so glad you’re here._

_Me, too._

The principal finally wrapped up his speech, meaning it was almost time for Ray to make his journey across the stage. He waited eagerly with his classmates, watching as they slowly progressed through the alphabet. When it finally got to the N’s, Ray tried not to panic. Tried not to focus too much on his walking. Tried not to think about tripping.

“Ray Narvaez Jr.” His heart skipped at the sound of his name, and he moved forward on autopilot. He’d just about reached his principal, with diploma in hand, when he caught sight of Ryan.

_I love you, I’m so proud of you._

Ray squared his shoulders and accepted his diploma with a confident smile.

* * *

After graduation happened in a blur. Everyone was congratulating him, and Ryan was much too far away. His mom was crying, and his dad seemed to actually look proud. Ray tried to hold a smile for as long as he could. Ryan, Ray was learning, had a talent for showing up exactly when he needed him. He slipped beside him, his hand sliding across Ray’s lower back to land gently on his hip. Ray turned into him slightly and smiled.

“I think it’s time I formally introduce myself,” Ryan said, sounding much more formal than Ray had ever heard him be. “Mr. and Mrs. Narvaez, I’m Ryan Haywood. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”

Ray’s mom started crying again, ignoring Ryan’s extended hand in favor of throwing her arms around both their necks, squeezing them too tightly. “Oh, I’m so happy for you both.”

His dad looked a little less sure, but he shook Ryan’s hand firmly. “We’re glad you could make it today.”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

His parents started asking him about school, all stuff that Ray had talked about with him in detail. He still had a few years left in his graduate program. Ray tried not to think about it too much. To think about the fact that, in less than a week, Ryan would be leaving again. He thought he’d be okay with it, but he loved being able to hug him, to hold him. It was going to be so hard to say goodbye, even if they were always connected.

Ryan must’ve been able to feel a shift in his mood, because he asked Ray’s parents if he could steal Ray for a couple hours before the Barbeque that afternoon. They happily agreed.

They went to one of Ray’s favorite cafés. It was gaming themed and had some of the best hot chocolate he’d ever tasted. Ryan paid, despite Ray’s protests, and they found a nice table in the corner. Ryan sat close, intertwining their hands. “What’s bugging you?”

“Nothing, today has been great.”

“Ray,” Ryan said quietly, “I know you; I know when you’re not telling me the truth. What’s bugging you.”

“I just… It’s going to be so hard to say goodbye to you.”

“I know.”

“You’re going to go all the way back to Austin, and I’m staying in New York. I just,” He sighed. “I want to be able to hold you and see you and I’m going to miss it so much.”

“I know; I’m going to miss it too. But we’ll make it work. I know we will.”

Ray nodded, but he couldn’t quite diminish the lump in his throat. Instead, he moved closer to Ryan.

* * *

Saying goodbye to Ryan was harder than he could’ve ever imagined. Ryan promised he’d come back, that he’d try and get some time off so he could spend part of the summer with Ray. And he knew that they’d always have their connection. Still, it felt like Ryan was taking a piece of Ray with him.

It was hard, being alone again. His bed felt empty, even as Ryan’s voice lulled him to sleep. When something interesting happened, he wanted to share it with him. But he wasn’t there.

They started playing videogames together, and Skyping. Both things Ray wasn’t sure why they hadn’t started doing long ago. It was nice to see his face, even via a grainy screen. It numbed some of the ache in his chest.

Still, as the summer progressed, things got harder. Ryan was less and less available, and the trip they were both looking forward to so much fell through. Ryan said he had to deal with some stuff at school, and he had to go tell his parents about Ray. But it felt like he was slipping away. Even their connection seemed weaker.

It was two weeks to the date he was due to start at NYU. Two weeks until it wasn’t possible for Ryan to come and see him because school would be starting again. Two weeks until Ray had to start the next chapter of his life. He wanted to talk to Ryan about it, but he had been so distant. Ray felt like he was interrupting something every time he tried to talk to him. So he didn’t.

His parents could tell something was wrong, but they didn’t know how to fix it. Ray didn’t know how to fix it, either. So when Michael showed up at their apartment that Friday, the last thing he wanted to do was go out.

“Dude, you’re going to college in two weeks. I’ve barely seen you all summer. I need my friend time, man.”

Ray agreed, partially out of guilt but mostly because Michael was right. It’d been forever since they hung out, and he missed his best friend. Plus, a night out might actually help him feel less shitty. He hoped.

Michael didn’t say where they were going, and wouldn’t answer any of Ray’s questions on the subject. “Michael, if you’re a serial killer I really need to know right now.”

“You’re fucking weird,” Michael said simply, dragging Ray onto the subway.

“ _I’m_ weird? You’re the one dragging me across the city without telling me where we’re going!”

“It’s a surprise.”

“I hate surprises,” Ray said.

“You’ll like this one.” He wasn’t so sure he believed Michael.

_If I go missing, it was Michael._ He told Ryan.

_What? Why?_

_He said we were going out and won’t tell me where._

_I’m sure you’ll be fine,_ Ryan chuckled. Ray frowned and shut up, allowing Michael to continue to drag him through the subways until they reached a very familiar part of the city. They were incredibly close to the NYU campus.

“Seriously Michael, where are we going?”

He turned abruptly, a huge grin on his face, and handed Ray an envelope. Ray glanced down, seeing an address on it. When he looked up, Michael had disappeared into the crowd. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

He opened the envelope, finding only a key inside. His heart started beating quicker. He looked at the address again, and the buildings surrounding them. He found the one in question to his left. His body was on autopilot, pushing its way through the crowd and towards the building, his shaking hand pushing the key into the lock, climbing his way up to the fourth floor. At the end of the hall there was a door that read _4B_ , just like key in his hands.

He started walking forward, but within two steps he was breaking into a jog. He stopped in front of the door, breathing heavily. His hand shook as he turned the knob and pushed it inwards.

His heart stopped when his eyes landed on the person standing in the middle of the room. On _Ryan_ standing in the middle of the room.

“Surprise,” He said quietly, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck.

“I don’t…” Ray looked around the apartment, “I don’t understand.”

“This is yours,” Ryan explained. He moved across the room, pulling Ray into his arms. “Well, it’s ours. If you’re willing.”

“Ryan, what are you saying?” Ray asked.

“I transferred schools. I’m doing the rest of my graduate up here.”

“You’re—what?”

“I’m going to be up here. With you.”

Ray shook his head, “But I thought you had to stay in Texas…”

“I thought so too. I was wrong.”

“So this…” Ray looked around, “This is ours?”

“It is if you’re willing to live with me.”

Ray threw his arms around Ryan’s neck, squeezing him tightly. He pressed messy kisses to his cheeks and lips, “Of course I am.”

“Good, because your parents are packing up your stuff right now.”

Ray laughed and brushed a tear off his cheek. He never thought he’d be this happy.

 


End file.
